CD: Erykah Badu, "Mama's Gun"

I spend longer amounts of time in my car now that my commutes between work, home, and school are more than twenty miles in any direction. It is not inordinate to find myself driving from 90 minutes to two hours a day. This means I listen to a lot of CDs, which I turn up until my ears hum and my mouth starts a feeble attempt at harmonizing with females and falsettos. But what to listen to when, say, your mother is in your car? Today I searched my CD collection in vain and settled on Green Day. I figured she couldn't take Beck or Radiohead ("Why do you have to listen to such depressing music?") and finally settled with Green Day. If you turn it way, way down, all you can hear is chord changes and no swearing. Past studies have shown that moms like Weezer but can't stand Nirvana. Jazz just makes the trip seem longer. Also, the Beatles are great but you have to let Mom do the choruses.

"I love how ESPN has NBA games on now. This is the change my life needed." --Jeff Gross