Tuesday, March 27, 2007


I'm too busy to breathe right now, let alone write a post. Still, I thought people would find this adorable. Here is an old video of the family dog, Misty, as a three-month-old puppy. Maybe I should submit this to CuteOverload.com

Saturday, March 17, 2007

White Chicks & Gang Signs

The big news is that I'm getting an apartment in Buffalo after the semester ends. If anyone has a hot lead on a decent place in the Allentown/Richmond/Symphony Circle area that will open up in about three months, let me know. If all goes as planned you'll see me walking around this summer's Art Festival in my pajamas.

Megan sent me this old picture of her and her sister. Don't tell her I posted it online. Awwwww:

Lately I've spent time in the ECMC mental ward. No, not for public nudity. And no, I was just VISITING. It's pretty much like you'd expect (Green Day's video for "Basket Case" comes to mind, sans colorization) but one thing struck me as oddly . . . normal . . . maybe? Whenever Sabres are on the whole ward slowly files into the rec room. They watch the game intently and quietly for the full two-and-a-half hours. When the game ends they all get up and slowly file out. I don't even think they celebrate goals. Do they relate to the sight of 18,000 "Cup Crazy" fans in ways the average person can't comprehend? Does watching other people who are out of their freaking minds calm them down? Guess I'll have to Read The Book.

Lately I also attended a special showing of the documentary Murderball with a special talk given by special guest, quadriplegic Olympian Mark Zupan. I had no idea he lived in Buffalo for several years as a kid. This was supposed to be a picture of him in the movie theater. Sorry. In honor of his accomplishments the entire audience sat through the remainder of the film.*

When I lived at Canisius I often took walks past this odd building on Hedley and wondered (A) what kind of rat-infested hole it really was inside and (B) why it didn't look like the buildings surrounding it. Just recently I found out it (A) literally was a rat-infested hole. However, now it is being refurbished because it (B) was originally built in the 1850s as an orphanage and is one of the oldest structures in Buffalo. We'll put this in the Things Only Fred Finds Interesting file.**

Finally, someone please tell me what's going on in the picture below. I laugh my ass off every time I think about it.

*That joke is lame.***

**"TOFFI" for short

***Oh great, I did it again.

Sunday, March 11, 2007

Dylan Hears a Who

The Original Site

Someone had the brilliant idea of having a Bob Dylan impersonator sing Dr. Seuss books. Amazing stuff, really. In case the site doesn't work (and it didn't yesterday), I uploaded all seven .mp3 files on a .zip over here. My personal favorite is McElligot's Pool: a little on the long side, but if you squint your brain a it actually sounds like something Dylan would write. Special thanks to BigO for first showing me these.

Oh, and then there's this thing:

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Weekend Update

The only film Leadbelly ever made

A post? From me? I shouldn't have.

A couple of milestones occurred in the past week, and as a nerd I must document them. Here are pictures of my car hitting the 100,000 mile mark.

Once your adrenaline levels go back down, check out the StatCounter to the right. This week it finally hit 10,000, or something like 20 hits a day. It's no Zombo.com, but at least this site is updated.

* * *

Not long ago I got on the Buffalo subway while a guy was having a seizure inside. As a certified teacher I'm actually trained to respond in situations like this. By "training" I mean they showed me a video. By "response" I mean you pretty much make sure they aren't going to hit their head on anything and you leave them alone. Even in a more serious case like this, where the guy was on the ground for a good minute, there is little reason to panic. All I did was give him some room. Other passengers felt differently. One passenger who(m?) I've named Charlie Mensa screamed for an ambulance for five minutes. During those five minutes the man on the floor actually got up AND LEFT THE TRAIN. When Mr. Mensa realized his patient had disappeared he began to give his diagnosis to who(m?)ever was still around. "He must have been embarrassed." Brilliant. "I bet that guy was under a lot of stress. That's how you get those things: you're under a lot of stress." Or, maybe it's a common condition called epilepsy. I'm surprised Mensa didn't just ask the guy to calm down.

* * *

Recently I was also in a bookstore. When I made it to the register one of the customers/cashier's friends began to squeal with delight. "OOH!" she said. "That BOOK! It's been giving me an aura all week. That always means someone's going to buy it." My first thought was "Lady, you need better hobbies." But secondly, you make the call. What kind of "aura" does this book give you?

* * *

This happened in class:

Me: "I learned a new history joke. Want to hear it?"
Class: "Yeah."
Me: "What's brown and hides in the attic?"
Class: "?"
Me: The Diarrhea of Anne Frank.

Student: "I don't think that's very funny."
Me: "Sorry. That was pretty juvenile of me."
Student: "No, who is Anne Frank?"

* * *

I'll end this post with some great pictures. Buffalo City Hall has an observation deck that's been closed for reconstruction about the past year. Using some connections, I was able to get in. Other buildings are taller but not open to the public. Even more unique about going upstairs was that all of the Plexiglas barriers had been removed, giving me and a few guests the best view of downtown buffalo that any tourist has seen in about 30 years. My camera has a water spot (or something) but you can still tell how remarkably clear the sky was last Saturday morning. In the background you can see Niagara Falls:

The Central Terminal, center:

The inner harbor is shaped like a buffalo:

I even got to break into the Council chambers. Here is the President's chair:

. . . and here I am in it.