Sunday, October 31, 2004

Trick or Treat

I was not present for this, nor was I involved with the planning. But I have the pictures. Happy Halloween, folks.

Uh huh.






And the kicker.

Fans of The Onion will recogize Dave as famous columnist Jim Anchower . . . at a football game.

Friday, October 29, 2004

Schrock Rock . . . THE FUTURE OF MUSIC

Turn up the volume and hit it

Click on the link and hold on to your seats.

TomServo0: i was wondering what you thought of ashlee simpson
TomServo0: since you're a REAL musician
SchROCK: I'd think more of her if she accepted the blame at the end of SNL
SchROCK: but she didn't. so she sucks and I will continue to think that until she wets my knob

A Cucumber + Ginseng account has also been created and is awaiting approval. Stay tuned.

Wednesday, October 27, 2004

Top 15 Biblical Ways to Acquire a Wife

Humor Break

Whatever you do, DON'T go out on a date. You DON'T have to get to know them first.

Speaking of Acts of God, the eclipse is out and Red Sox are about to win the World Series. One more inning. It's really gonna happen!

Making Salmon

An Environmental History of the Northwest Fisheries Crisis

For one of my classes we have to send out an E-mail discussing that week's reading before class. Here's this week; tell me what you think.

The only other environmental history I've read is Mark Fiege's "Irrigated Eden," and that was just this week. My thoughts on Taylor's book, then, are a bit more comparative. Without saying too much about Fiege, the two authors take very different views about human intervention in nature. For Taylor, industrialization is almost purely detrimental. Humans throw the environment off its natural equilibrium and the results are nearly irrevocable. Fiege, on the other hand, includes humans as part of the environment. They do not destroy nature but alter it, and nature eventually finds its balance again. Reading Fiege first, coupled with Taylor's activist tone, made me question Taylor's assumptions about the immediacy of environmental danger.

Also, Taylor uses salmon to "illustrate the distribution of social power in society, the social and environmental consequences of policies, and the internal contradictions of salmon management." (11) In that sentence alone it is interesting to see society hinted at three times, and environment once; "salmon management" is the afterthought. There are a number of places in the book where it seems the priority is people, not place or thing. One thing I thought about this week was whether history without humans is possible. Is a purely environmental history achieveable? If a tree falls in the woods and it's not a human's fault, can we write about it?

Even when Taylor does not discuss the actions of people, nature takes on some human characteristics. Fish struggle to survive and reproduce, die slowly and painfully, and are exploited much like whites exploited the natives. To natives, coyotes are tricksters and foxes are crafty. (28-9) There is a "fish culture." (130) Ultimately the salmon need someone to "speak" for them because locals "resent . . . their cultural irreverence." (248) Salmon even have "schools."

That was a long setup to a bad joke. Still, I think it's an interesting question.

Tuesday, October 26, 2004

Ashlee Simpson Cancels Concert: "Something Wrong With Her Voice"

KSL News

MORE IMPORTANTLY . . . Applebee's wrote me back! No coupons, though. :(

Dear Fred,

Thank you for your recent email regarding our commercial where the restaurant staff stays open later to serve a football team. This commercial was based on an event that did happen. While we can't promise to always re-open after a store closes its door, we do promise that we are striving to become American's favorite neighbor. Thank you so much for the feedback on our commercial.

Your comments will be sent to our marketing team.


Regina Pierce
Guest Relations Coordinator
Ref # 246475

John Peel 1939-2004

Peel's huge impact on music

:( This guy rocked. Remember when deejays played music they liked? See the Eliot Spitzer link below.

Monday, October 25, 2004

Ashlee Simpson's dad blames acid reflux

Capital News 9

Hence the propensity to dance instead of sing.

Ashlee Simpson lip-sync - Inside Track: Ashlee suffers lip-sync meltdown

At least Britney Spears can pretend she's singing her Pro-Tooled little ditties. But it's too bad the link to my last post is down now. The Chinese new site I wrote about used the word "Shift" in the title of an article on good buddy Eliot Spitzer but left out the "F". That slip-up's just as funny.

Saturday, October 23, 2004

Re: Eduardo

Vacation 1 023.jpg (JPEG Image, 640x480 pixels)

Here is the picture from Ed's blog that shows my Atopic Dermatitis. Its actually looks worse now, except there are no cuts. It's just one big ugly red mark.

Eliot Spitzer is the MAN (again)

The Globe and Mail

Pardon my Google Ads. I want them to appear right under my header but I'm doing something wrong. I did, however, figure out how to put a live feed of C-SPAN 3 on the page which is pretty awesome. Right now they're re-enacting the Lincoln-Douglass Debates! C-SPAN IS TEH R0X0RS. Anyway, check out the ads. My laptop wouldn't have a working battery if it weren't for Froogle and Google is good people.

Friday, October 22, 2004

The Letter I Wrote To Applebee's Today

Galactic Debate 2004

You know, I saw your commercial--the one where they're closing and a team shows up and they open back up--and you know what? It was total fudging bullsheep!

1. The team lost from a last-minute field goal, and the score was 21-20? How often does that happen? Almost never!

2. It takes at least an hour to get the fryer running again!

3. If corporate found out that manager was giving away overtime pay the whole staff would get the ax!

4. During the weekends Applebee's closes at 1 and 2 in the morning, meaning the bus driver and ENTIRE team, at 3 AM, thought "Gee, I think Applebee's is still open!"

5. "Yeah, I think it IS open because all the lights are off!"

6. "Well don't just drive by the empty parking lot, park and every single one of us will ALL pile out in the rain and check!"

I could count to 20 without thinking but I WON'T because I have early stage Carpal Tunnel Syndrome and would have to go to the hospital! Those players are too short to be on a football team! See, that's one more! In the FUTURE I hope your advertising team will do some RESEARCH and show things as they really are! My father is a bus driver and would be really upset if he saw this! And I want some coupons!


Atopic Dermatitis

Really Gross Pictures

I went to the doctor today and mentioned that the back of my knees (Is there such a place? I mean the back of my leg where it bends in the middle.) have had rashes. Since June. I have a medical condition! Still, I had no idea what she was talking about. (She also checked me out for testicular cancer, and amazingly I didn't miss a word of that.) According to, atopic dermatitis is "a severe form of dermatitis characterized by atopy". That didn't help me. "Atopy", however, is "dermatitis characterized by intense itching, occurring in individuals predisposed to developing certain hypersensitivity reactions". So now I have a basic idea even with the circular diction. Essentially, the allergies I had growing up and had thought disappeared kind of transmogrified into sensitive reactions to pollens and whatnot that come out through the skin. Now I have a prescription and what looks like a permanent condition. So the one day that summer when I really tried to get some sun and exercise showed me I have to relegate my activity to staying in. There goes the rugged lumberjack life I never had.

Thursday, October 21, 2004

They Caught Me

The Associated Press

I took all those pictures while Lynndie pointed. Then someone found my memory card and ruined all the fun.

Tuesday, October 19, 2004

A Missing Scene from Fahrenheit 9/11

The Silence of the Domes

Tonight I went to a lecture given by a member of the government's 9/11 Committee. He didn't say too much because as he focused on questions from the audience (victims' family members also attended) but he did give a clear and concise summary of the Commission's findings, namely that there needed to be a federal intelligence chief and other administrative reforms. What disturbed me was what I perceived to be the influence of--sorry to mention Jon Stewart again--"partisan hackery" on the undergraduates. Perhaps they really do believe everything they see on TV. No less than four times did students ask about Iraq, even after the speaker specifically said they found no connection between Al Qaida and Saddam Hussein leading to the 2001 attacks. Logically, then, a member of the 9/11 Commission probably did not research anything else involving the second Gulf War of 2003, a point that had to be continually reiterated. Similarly, another student inquired--inarticulately--about the connections between Osama bin Laden and multinational corporations. There are none, though I can think of some propaganda that proposed such a conspiracy theory. Former Rep. John LaFalce introduced the speaker and took advantage of the microphone to reference Bob Woodward's book about Bush's planning to attack Iraq even on 12 September 2001. That much is probably true, but again has nothing to do with a lecture about 9/11, even if it is two weeks from the election. Still it was nice to see that intelligent, thoughtful and patient officials work for the federal government, and that citizens of a similar caliber, even after the deaths of loved ones, could group together and put those officials in line for the public welfare.

Monday, October 18, 2004

A Steve & Barry's store (sp?) opened up in the local mall and my mother went buck wild. She got us all jackets for $10 each. Canada University has a well-known hockey team.

Today I cooked 2 lbs. of spaghetti. Normally I would eat half of that but since I've been sick I could only eat a quarter. :(

Sunday, October 17, 2004

Some recent pics. Now that I know my adapter was broken, not the computer, this was completely unneccesary. Fun bonus: this is my new background.

Honest Ed's, on Bloor St. in Toronto. Read the yellow signs.

The 3-in-1 house. Reminds me of "Physical Graffiti".

The University of Toronto's sign looks like the Homomonument from Amsterdam. Two people will get what I'm saying.

Most of our day trip to Toronto was spent around Little Korea.


The band C'mon does their thing.

JC of Danko Jones, straight from a Black Sabbath album cover.

The Mango Kid.

The party room at Lee's Palace.

Dave gets excited over the new Lindsay Lohan article.

Saturday, October 16, 2004

Choose or Lose - Headlines

Choose or Lose - Headlines

Though I don't approve of a lot of what the Choose or Lose people do--other than registering voters, of course, but I think they have other agendas--this article says something a bit interesting. I downloaded this interview and what shocks me is this is so shocking. I watched Crossfire once and couldn't stand it. I've watched the Daily Show almost every episode since it started because of its quick wit. If Crossfire were on Comedy Central it would be worth seeing. But you know what? If you put the Daily Show on CNN you would actually learn something from it. It is supposed to be a humorous supplement to news you already know. News, however, doesn't give you "information" any more. I have to get my American news from Canadian television because they will tell me something about the world. For comparison, watch a half-hour of Headline News and count the number of products they advertise beside the commercials: movies, celebrity interviews, cars, computers, sports teams. Politics cannot be covered unless there is an equal time rebuttal: hundreds of thousands protested X, and here also are ten people that disagree. News is not alone in the commercialization of the media: I could write also about the perpetuation of racial stereotypes and MTV. Today however, something bled through. I'm ranting like a run-of-the-mill blogger now, aren't I?

Friday, October 15, 2004

Google Desktop Search Download

Click Here

It's awesome! I think it still has some bugs, like the IM conversation it only recorded half of. Then again it may recache all that info and still be somewhere. Just to be sure I'll keep my IMs as Notepad files. So far Google has been a godsend; I haven't had to manually record my E-mails since G-mail, I can search faster, and if I'm lucky now I won't have to keep opening up Notepad for IMs. It sounds anal retentive to keep all those conversations, but once you start doing it you realize how useful the idea is (and I've been doing it for six years now). Still, where do these IMs go? Google seems to trust that their servers are bank vaults but I'm too conservative to believe it. ANYWAY, I did a couple quick word searches to see just what was on my computer. I think I learned a little about myself in the process:

PORN: 18 files (not actual "porn" but the actual WORD "porn," FYI)
DEATH: 56 files
SADDAM: 13 files
SODOMY: 0 files (phew!)
BUSH SUCKS: 12 files
"BUSH SUCKS" (used as a phrase): 0 files
KERRY SUCKS: 9 files
"KERRY SUCKS": 1 file
BOOBS: 11 files
BEATLES: 11 files
YANKEES: 4 files
RED SOX: 8 files
CRAP: 53 files
SHIT: 43 files
POO: 15 files
POOP: 10 files
POOH: 24 files
DEUCE: 1 file
JESUS: 43 files
SATAN: 5 files
HEAVEN: 13 files
HELL: 84 files
OSAMA: 7 files
BIN LADEN: 7 files
OSAMA BIN LADEN: 6 files (???)
OOO: 41 files
AHH: 23 files
OH: 391 files
OHH: 14 files
OHHH: 19 files
OHHHH: 11 files
OHHHHH: 2 files
OHHHHHHH: 1 file
I'M STUPID: 49 files
YOU'RE STUPID: 52 files

Friday, October 08, 2004

Rock Paper Scissors Spock Lizard

I finally cracked my laptop open to see what I could find. I found nothing. I'm also missing two long screws that should go in the bottom four extra small screws that go who-knows-where. Maybe I should take this to a shop.

Monday, October 04, 2004

Just Great

Yesterday my computer began beeping due to low battery power. That was not unusual except for the fact that it was plugged into the wall, and nomatter what I did the power kept depleting. Quickly it became unusable. Hoping it might be a bad AC adapter as the connection was a little loose, I went to the store. I asked around to see if they would check out my situation (I brought my computer) and they reassured me it was not the adapter. What probably happened is that I bumped the input in just the right way to break the connection to the motherboard. Unless the break can be soldered together I'm looking at paying $690 for a new motherboard. For that price I might as well spend $1000 and get a new laptop instead. Of course I have neither $690 nor $1000 so I'm really hoping the good people at Dell can fix it. In any event I'll be using my father's desktop for the next month. This really, really sucks. Anyone got any good ideas?

Friday, October 01, 2004

Master debaters

Iraq and terrorist record stretched two ways in debate

Tonight was the Bush vs. Kerry debate. Or, as a commentator on the CBC called it, the Battle of the Inarticulate. Kerry won! It was a surprise to me. Not that he won by much, however. (Yes, I mean "won" as in a boxing match kind of win.) It kind of reminded me of Super Bowl XXV, when the Bills lost to the Giants 20-19. Kerry, or the Giants, played solid football throughout. He was succinct and direct enough to hold off accusations of "flip-flopping," though Bush, or the Bills, did what he could to force it in. But in the end it was a missed field goal: Bush was slightly angry during the first third, competitive but not eloquent in the second third, and just plain tired by the end. For Kerry's sake he got a bit repetitive as well. In conclusion, Bush was close but wide right. It will be interesting to see if Kerry pulls an Al Gore and gets too cocky for the next debate. Did anyone notice that they both confused Osama bin Laden at one point, and their wives both kind of wore the same thing there? Interesting. My favorite part of the debate was when they discussed having bilateral or multilateral. Did anyone get to count how many times Bush said, "This is hard work"? It seemed like a lot.


Today was my sister's birthday. She didn't want her picture taken so she pretended to look at the fan instead.

This is Hannah's friend Jeff. Jeff doesn't like his picture taken either.

MARG waits patiently for pizza and wings.