Sunday, April 27, 2008
Her Name Is Alberta, She Lives In Vancouver
Recently cousin Jasson (link updated) discussed the joys of a short trip across the border to Toronto. Oh, but what about the joys of having family in Canada, and visiting several times per year for a lifetime?
Good things about binationalism:
1. Poutine. Definitely poutine.
2. Learning applicable use of the word "eh."
3. Canada ends about fifty miles north of the border. Any farther and you're in Narnia.
4. The greatest sports show in history, Hockey Night in Canada. It's on public television, meaning hockey fights are practically subsidized by the government.
5. Toronto: the city New York could be if it got rid of all that pesky poverty and crime.
Bad things about binationalism:
1. Having to spend more than ten seconds explaining what country you're from. (Just say "American.")
2. Having to hear both sides of the most boring ethnic dispute possible: "Who won the War of 1812?"
3. A dollar isn't worth a dollar. The dollar used to be worth a lot more than a dollar but for a while it was less than a dollar. A dollar is about one dollar now, but you have to exchange dollars for dollars and there's usually a fee making dollars more than a dollar.
4. Being reminded that I'm one-half of the Shreddies duo.
5. I have to know all the states AND provinces, miles AND kilometers, Presidents AND Prime Ministers, and who won the Super Bowl AND the Grey Cup.
The best part of all:
Making fun of both countries without remorse.
Special thanks goes out to Sarah G for the year's best birthday card. We've been to a ton of Canadian shows and stayed awake for two day to see the Pope visit Downsview Park. Good times all.
Avenue Q is at Shea's all this week.